Friday, November 5, 2010

Job Application Reply Letter

Dear Mr. SoAnd So,

We regret to inform you
that the position
is no longer available.

You were our Favorite candidate
even though you did not have
the type of experience we were looking for.

You seemed to possess a kind of
confidence in the subject matter
just by being yourself.

You seemed to be a perfect candidate
until we found out that you applied
at our enemy company.

The position is going to be given
to someone who walks in here
with the inevitable smile on his bright face,
a witty retort escaping his cheek,
with good credit, and an honest, open heart,
a sympathetic ear, and an apology every time
he becomes human and I call him out on it.
He will never make me feel like there's
someone better. And I will not live in a fairytale.
He will simply be in the future.
But he is not you.

Because I am not a job.
I am a vacation.

We wish you luck with your future endeavours.
And hope that our criticism has been most constructive.
We know that it will be. (And, that, is not a good thing.)