Friday, April 30, 2010

On Morality

I was reading Days of War Nights of Love: Crimethink for Beginners. In the introduction they talk about moral law and God and thought I'd share a few thoughts of my own on the matter.

They mention- in short- that the social construct we label as morality and religion was made to get everyone on the same page. They also ask why people aren't typically compelled to question these.

My impulse answer is comfort. Their answer is fear. But as I think about it they go hand-in-hand.

I've done many terrible things in my lifetime. I've been called selfish, thoughtless, heartless. I have regrets and will never say that I live a life of "no regrets" because that would hardly make for a life well-lived and a mind, conscience and heart constantly well-developed.

I feel bad for the people who can't see past the social construct of morality. I picture horses with blinds on, to keep from distractions, to keep them going, go, go, gone.

I think on all the moral wrongs my name is associated with and I don't feel ashamed. But I do regret the hurt I've caused people. But I resent that their hurt is based on years of perpetual self-righteousness. And in using that word, I don't mean to play their role and be self-righteous but if that isn't the word for it I don't know what is.

Perhaps, I should try and rename this idea: It is perpetual unconscious self-righteousness.

I don't think people are ready to have no written laws. I don't think people are ready to live without religion. I think people are too stupid to understand themselves. I think if there were ever cavemen they were more honorable than our "civilization".

When we try to understand themselves we come up with a misconception-the "self", individuality which completely cancels out the idea that we are civilized by its very definition . But at the same time the idea of morality as part of a civilization seems unreal, impossible because we are so focused on the self. And why shouldn't we be? We are meant to be alone. Death happens to each of us individually. Of course if say a president dies a whole country is affected

This never-ending loneliness is why people have to work to make marriages last, there are sacrifices to be made, re-labeled "compromises".

The word compromise has a very different connotation but think about all the times you've given up something for relationship bliss, stability or just for the mere sake of not being in trouble. I don't presume to think one should be selfish but to maybe question what this means in the greater scheme of life.

The key to killing this idea of morality is acceptance. In ridding ourselves of the ideology of morality we build another one called acceptance. Very simply put, very simple to recognize and use, "shit happens".

One should follow the ideas of right and wrong that are already in place, if the awareness of genuine caring and love were the compass of our actions we wouldn't need moral laws. But if we learned how to accept hatred and negativity to be honest about what holds us back and then question it, the world would be a more harmonious place.

More (clearer) thoughts to follow on this seemingly existential idea.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Never did I notice until my poetry teacher said it- my life consists of inconsistencies, instability, unlikeliness. It was obvious in my writing. The things that weren't supposed to happen, the places I wouldn't see, I wouldn't live in, and the people I shouldn't have met or fell in love with are the frays of my everyday conscience and the memories revisited, avoided. Improbability is commonplace but not precisely predictable, like expecting warm weather in spring but it reaching 80 degrees. Most people chock it up to the adage "That's life!" Yet I guess I'm too secretive for them to get the full picture. Or am I ashamed to not have had a normal circumstance since the day I was born, hurting my mother to get out 2 months early?